How To Embrace Reinvention
after a shit storm
My theme. My new buzz word. And the reason why you are looking at a website with a white canvas in which I am ready to place my brush upon.
Real? That’s all I can offer at this moment.
You see, I’m coming off a wee-bit of a shit storm. And for me that was entangled in essentially not speakig my truth.
The truth I held so sacred and revered for everyone to speak. Yep, that truth.
BUT, before you think I’m gonna go all cynical and pessimistic on yo ass…nah.
I’m affirming that life is one giant experiment and that is exactly what I did – experimented.
I threw myself into new business ventures and new ideas around money.
I played with bright, visionary peeps who want to be of service to this world just as much as I do! Refreshing it is, I say.
I rode hard on spirituality and looking back I drove the spirituality bus over the cliff – which is why I feel like I am free falling. Now, I’m not dogging the Universe and all things divine. Not at all. Actually I’m praising all things holy. It was me that had some interesting points of view and I was missing a sweet-ass piece to the pie…ACTION.
Yep, I was the one waiting for shit to fall from the sky via all things spiritual, but ya know what I wasn’t doing? Taking action. Now, I was showing up, no doubt. But, I wasn’t putting in the whole “hard work” piece because I cut off my awareness to any word that connotated life not being “easy.” Geez, Kel.
And, with any good leap of faith you learn quickly your priorities and what you really desire in life.
The thoughts of those for me flashed quickly and shot at me like a dart to a bullseye: being with my family, nurturing the friendships in my life, creative expression, all things green and no longer cutting off my awareness to the things that do feel light in my world – like being spiritual and rich. Bam, I just said that.
So, here I am again.
Starting over. Recreating. Reinvention. Rebirthing.
It feels damn heart expanding in my world.
I also sit here and ponder vulnerability. Definitely an attribute I don’t “show” very much, but learned a lot in this latest experiment in life that vulnerability is the sweet spot in life. I’m ready and willing to scratch the v-word and bring her forth as seemingly acting like a laughing robot no longer serves me.
And while we’re talking about vulnerability, I must open up my heart space where indecision has its pretty little home. Are you the type to change your mind a lot? A flip-flopper maybe? I’ve been called that a lot, but judment isn’t serving my ass either.
However, what I realized is I need accountability (which is why I always thrived in traditional 9-5 work environments).
Now this whole entrepreneur, you are your own boss thing, I’m learning ok? I need an official bitchslapper in my life to go, “Yo, you said you were going to do this – WTF?!” And then bitchslap me like those Batman and Robin cartoon strips I see on the interwebs. Hahahaha. Any takers?
And of course, this little love poem would not be pouring out of me without acknowledging some of the most profound teachers and mirrors I’ve experienced thus far in life…
My soul acknowledges your soul and my feelings of what needed to be brought up within myself (the shadow work). So, where I initially felt anger, resentment and judgment…I now feel love, gratitude and forgiveness for what I so desperately needed to be more of me.
Thank you teachers, mirrors and experiments. I honor your journey as I honor my own, and deep gratitude resides in my heart for knowing better about myself. Thank you.
Infinite Love + Reinvention,