It Hurts So Good: Why Expressing Your Truth…Is F*cking Worth It.

 

Have you ever chose to go down the rabbit hole, and actually liked where it ended up?

The hubs and I do that often.

The other night we actually decided to go to bed at the same time + began pillow talking like crazy. We strolled hardcore down memory lane like two eagles cutting through the clouds.

We discussed, in laughing detail, the last 5+ years of our life and relationship. It was pretty crazy going over certain times and events, because the perspective is so different where we are now. We grew. We didn’t stay stagnant.

And that conversation circled me back + confirmed what I believe in most: Truth.

Let’s dig a little deeper, shall we?…

 

I’m not sure if I ever told you the story about how I almost left my husband. Not in a shocking way. No drama, but I was so willing to choose ME + certain aspects of life, that I told my husband, “I have to do this for me. You are more than welcome to come along for the journey, but I’m doing this with or without you.”

That may sound super intense, but, well, that is me – fucking intense.

The hubs, thankfully, isn’t as intense as my ass (that would be one crazy relationship if so) and chose to go along for the journey.

I steward a ship to Santa Barbara, CA and back in four months, or so. We painfully landed back in Colorado with a drained checking account and a really scary place of starting over from scratch at thirty years old.

Scary. As. Fuck.

But, again, we chose to grow.

We chose to talk it out.

We chose to be really raw.

We deemed our truth worthy enough to be heard.

 

Because of all of these sometimes frightening, sometimes exhilarating choices throughout our relationship, we are at this really sweet spot in our marriage.

We came out the other end so pruned, picked, prodded – like the mother that goes through hell to push that baby out – and a miracle appears in the form of a baby.

Whenever I talk to my friends about my relationship with Josh, I always say, “It’s based upon brutal, at times, painful, raw, truth. Nothing more. Nothing less. That’s how we work our shit out. And then, we either grow together, or we grow apart.”  Thankfully, we have grown together thus far. 🙂

Choose being raw + speaking your truth as much as possible: not just to a partner, but also to anyone you share sacred space with. It will save you.  

 

What does a raw conversation look like?

  • It’s your husband speaking his truth, lovingly, yet, so vulnerable while you are in the midst of transferring clothes from the washer to the dryer…and then standing there hashing it out for an hour.
  • It’s driving to the airport + dropping a truth-bomb to clear that weird energy you’ve been feeling for awhile.
  • It’s listening to your best friend tell you a story that you think no longer serves her + when she’s done, telling her to get her head out of her ass for a little bit and tell the ego to take a seat for awhile.
  • It’s you choosing vulnerability, wide-open, heart beating outside your chest moments…because on the other side is clarity, freedom and a huge sigh that says, “Thank you for choosing your truth. Thank you.”
  • It’s calling one of your soul sisters + saying, “I’m not okay right now, I need to chat. This happened…I’m feeling this way…”

 

Your truth:

…Is NOT The Last Word.

…It is NOT a bat to be beaten over someone.

…Is an expression of YOU.

…Is a glimpse of who you are at THAT time.

 

You are NOT stuck in that truth.

You CAN change your mind at anytime.

 

Expressing your truth, in a sacred space, is a purging of stuck energy. It is a firework finally lit.

 

It will catapult you to your next highest truth…if you keep choosing.

 

 

Love + Hurting So Good,

Keli 

 

 

CONTINUE READING

Why I Quit School + Other Life Saving Lessons

 

I quit school.

The weekend after Thanksgiving, as I sat down to write two research papers, I called my husband:

“Hey, babe. I think I need you to talk me down from the edge… because I’m about to be super irrational and quit school,” I whimpered, as I called him in a frantic mess with a touch of peacefulness.

As my hubs usually does, he broke it down for me:

“Ummm, well, babe, I could tell you what society would say, ‘You are half way through’, ‘You can do this, push through, think how great you will feel when it’s done.’ OR, I can suggest that you journal, meditate and pray about it.”

I did the latter. 

I sat at the table, whipped out my journal and got down to soul stretching business. I journaled every single thing I was feeling, without judgment, out.

I sat in silence, trying to be thoughtless for at least ten minutes.

And then, I prayed; peace was now crashing my shores of indecision. 

It didn’t take long at all actually. I opened up my laptop and immediately emailed my advisor about withdrawing and declaring that I know all of it is super counter-productive in the eyes of academia (and many others I’m sure).

But, I did it anyway + I literally felt like a giant boulder was lifted off of my shoulder.

I knew in that moment I made a decision which honored my soul. And I haven’t looked back since. 

After I sent that email and closed my laptop, I sat in my cozy kitchen chair and felt weightless.

I knew I had to regroup and a whisper inside me was getting louder and more frequent to slow the hell down. So, I did.

I decided to take the entire month of December off.

And, I actually did it. Whoa. 

 

You see, I didn’t get to quitting school over night. It was a long journey I’ve been on most of my life.

I over-committed by going back to school because I didn’t think I was going to have enough to do as a new stay-at-home-mom and caregiver. (BULLSHIT).

I also went on a future-trippin’ binge + freaked myself out by wondering WTF I was going to do with myself when I didn’t have anybody to take care of. (Even MORE bullshit!)

Add on my writing and building a blogging business.

Yep, not enough (super joking right there). 

This business of me being a serial over-committer has been a journey in the making, but recently, it was becoming painfully obvious I really shouldn’t ignore it so much.

In November I went to our local Holistic Health Fair and went to see my favorite Shaman lady.

As the Shamanic work began, the first thing she remarked about was my highly generous amount of scattered-ness and disconnect I had going on.

And, although I did not want to hear it, I had to agree with her.

She brought up my need for making a list (ouch!) and even called me out on my difficulty of staying in the present moment (dude, I write blogs about that, how could that be?!).

It could very well be; she was on point with everything she was saying.

I knew I was in for a ride at that point.

As she worked to clear my chakras (had some MAJOR jamming in the root and solar plexus) and get any un-stuck energy flowing…

I was then bitch slapped again when I was reminded about my major masculine energy and that, if I choose, I can truly be guided to embrace more of my divine feminine energy as well.

On top of everything I was hit with in that session, the moving of that energy actually purged out of me in various ways including an almost week long stomach illness (hello root and solar plexus energy) that left me asking everyone else for help.

What I’m trying to say is – I KNEW I NEEDED TO SLOW DOWN.

The Divine had been trying to tell me this in subtle and not so subtle ways.

But, I was still boarding my crazy train from time to time. 


Okay, back to the month off…

Balance has always been one of my challenges in life and well, I was pretty much over trying to DO that anymore.

I was ready to chill the fuck out. I even wrote myself a note to do just that:

 

And this is what I did for a whole month:

I read the books I had put off.

I prayed, a lot.

I journaled.

I meditated, a lot.

I wrote.

I stayed off of social media, a lot.

I watched copious amounts of mind-numbing television without feeling bad.

I increased my nights out with the soul-sisters.

I laughed and played more with my daughter.

I engaged in life and in the present moment.

I ate whatever I wanted.

I chose to create a judgement-free zone for myself.

I stopped comparing + began choosing love.

And I did a shit-ton of The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte.

*Life Changer/Game Changer/Must Read/Blasted Me Over The Hump – soooo good for the soul book.*

You can purchase it HERE if you are down to “creating goals with soul” as Danielle puts it. 

It wasn’t always easy. In fact, it took moment-by-moment trudging and finally, choosing, at times.

It wasn’t until the third week of December when I started feeling the upside of taking all of this time off.

I needed that much time to get back to the center. 


When I took that time off, I received interesting feedback.

Sometimes, it was super supportive: “Good for you! Sometimes that is exactly what you have to do for yourself.”

Sometimes, it was like I was speaking a foreign language: “You are doing what? I wish I could do that!” 

And sometimes, it was darn right blasphemous to others: “I could never do that. Why would you WANT to do that?l!”

Point: respect your own journey, honor that inner voice which is trying to speak to you and bless others on their own journey. 


 

It is now January 5th as I write this blog. And let me tell you, I highly fucking recommend taking the time off you need, no questions asked.

I feel more centered, grounded and most of all CLEAR on who I truly am + how I want to show up in this world.

That is freedom in my eyes because I’ve always struggled with purpose.

 

I know some of you are probably thinking, “Holy hell, I can’t take a month off! Sure would be nice. But, let’s get real.”

And, I totally get that. So, let me be real with you…

My world looks like this: 

At this moment in time, my main “job” is stay-at-home-mom and caregiver.

I have a shiny, spunky, spit-fire four-year old and an eighty-two year old father (The Vic he is affectionately referred to) who has dementia (you can read more about that journey HERE) whom I take care of.

When my Elsa-adoring daughter is in preschool a few times a week, I get in my time of being the half-ass writer and blog enthusiast I am, while The Vic rocks out on some opera.

In 2014 I also added in the experimentation and later, obsession, with dōTERRA essential oils. So, I share the oils, have classes, blog and do fun “lab work” in the kitchen/bathroom with them!

When I’m not writing, or building my blogging and dōTERRA business (which truly is very part-time thus far), I enjoy nothing more than cooking and doing “house” stuff. I’m super serious, I really do.

My hubs works a normal “9-5” job per say, so he’s gone during the day.

So, when I say, I took the whole month of December off, I mean I didn’t send a blog out, or actively work on anything dōTERRA.

I was DEF mommin’ and wife-ing it up still. No doubt about that.

I share this with you because I would get myself into these traps when someone would say things like what I just said about taking a month off.

I would start comparing myself, wondering how they could do that and then judgement would set in. What I didn’t realize, is that it looks different for everyone.

If this blog speaks to you and perhaps, you see a glimpse of yourself in me, know that taking a break, or time off is possible – but, respect your world and make it your own. 

Maybe your world doesn’t look like mine + you work 40+ hours/week – that’s cool.

Perhaps take vacation time, stay in all weekend, devote your evenings to nothing but YOU.

Maybe your a stay-at-home-mom, but need more you-time. 

Wake up early, stay up late, use nap time, call a girlfriend to babysit, get a family member on board. Use your partner!

This is not selfish, this is what is needed for us to move forward, SANELY, in life, yo. 

 

Make. It. Your. Own. 

Do what feels right in your bones, not someone else’s. 

 

Love you like crazy trains + a month off,

Keli 

CONTINUE READING

Confessions Of A Recovering Perfectionist: What My Soul Needed To Learn In The Kitchen.

 

Have you ever tried to make a recipe without exact measurements?

Do you try to live life with the intention of perfection?

I had a soul-expanding experience about perfection and the need to “get it right” all while cooking and experimenting in the kitchen recently.

You see I’m a recovering perfectionist. Growing up I learned that perfection equaled love. If I could only attain “perfection” I would then be worthy of love. A love I was seeking from a despondent, emotionally unavailable mother who had her own demons.

I was young, impressionable and yearned desperately for a mother to notice me, light up in my presence and mostly, just love the hell out of me.

At the time, I wasn’t able to see she wasn’t well enough to do those things I wanted from her. So, I had this intention that if I could just be perfect and do all things “right” I could potentially earn her love.

I was trying to be her doctor; perfection was my medicine of choice and love was the desired outcome. Sometimes, patients don’t do what their doctors tell them.

I carried the “perfection equals love” equation with me well into my adulthood. That, which protected us in our childhood, actually hinders us as adults and we don’t even recognize it. I struggled to say “no” and set boundaries. I was overworked, yet restless. My spirit longed for a deeper connection to life then people pleasing + walking on eggshells trying to live up to certain standards. And I was doing this all in the name of l-o-v-e. Whoa!

Eventually life threw enough stuff my way for me to wake-up. I realized this “stuff” was happening FOR me, and my own soul-spurt of growth. I eventually worked through shiz-tons of my crap on being a perfectionist, letting that go and what love really is.

And for me, a part of my perfectionism is that whole black or white thinking. After I did my “work” I thought, “Oh girl, you got this licked. Thank God I’m done with THAT learning lesson!”

But, are we ever really done with a lesson?

 Hell-to-the-NO!

 

Back to the kitchen as my classroom…

As I stood in front of the refrigerator thinking of what I was going to throw together for dinner I just started following my intuition (and taking a gander at Pinterest of course).

I saw an idea for sweet potatoes and chicken – all baked and yummy!

I grabbed sweet potatoes and started cutting them. Then carrots entered my mind, so I pulled them out, sliced ‘em up and threw them in as well. I ended up adding some diced onions, olive oil, maple syrup, Italian seasoning and plopping the chicken on top of it all!

I baked it, kept checking on it and baked it some more.

It looked done to me (again, following my intuition), so I got it out of the oven and started fixing me a bowl. It sure as hell looked + smelled good; I hoped it tasted the same.

And then I ate it and it was heaven in my mouth!!

Being the foodie I am, I love to share all of my recipes with you guys. Then I started getting anxious because I did not write down at all how to make this dish because I was so in the moment of cooking.  I thought: “How the hell is anyone going to make this recipe, let alone get to enjoy it, if I don’t have everything in a nice package for you?!”

So, I did what any decent blogger building an online biz does: I took it to social media. LOL!

I wrote this on Facebook and Instagram:

“I experimented in the kitchen tonight w/ some sweet taters, carrots and chicken. I must say it was fab + would truly love to share it with you, but I’m a half-ass recipe-taker (how do I have a blog?)! Would you read it if the measurements were “a dab of this” and “a scosh of that?” Any other peeps out there have resistance to perfect measurements?!”

 

And this is the response I received: 

“I can’t follow a recipe either. I have a flare for fabulous in the kitchen, but create recipes? Not without pinches, dabs, spoonfuls, and skoshes, lol. I say go for it and we will all get to create our own versions of your deliciousness.”

“Follow a receipe! not me!”

“dab and scosh yes!”

“Dude… Rachel Ray has a whole tv show/magazine/website and she measures in palmfuls. Haha TOTALLY acceptable (I do the same thing, by the way… And write it like that in my blog. Haha)”

 

With each response I read I felt like my wings were expanding wider and wider. I leaned into that freedom and it felt so damn good.

I was able to recognize that this was my perfectionism talking and I sat and thought about how many times I wasn’t showing up in life, or expressing myself fully because I didn’t have the entire “recipe” on hand.

Be cognizant of Perfect Pete showing up to ruin your party. Recognize him and kindly tell the bastard it’s time for him to go home.

I kind of made a vow to myself that I would no longer NOT share something because I didn’t have the recipe down to a science, or that the picture I took wasn’t of “professional” quality.

Screw that.

This world needs all of our light + brilliance whether it be in the kitchen, at work, in a relationship, or even a kind smile to the barista at the coffee shop.

So, if I send you something with not the best lighting, or the recipe isn’t “perfect” just know I’m sharing it with you because I love it and perhaps someone else might as well. Love it and make it your own.

 

Now, in the name of not so perfect, here is the “recipe” for the Sweet Potato + Chicken yumminess. Blank canvas, own that baby and run with it!

Ingredients:

  • 4-5 sweet potatoes, diced
  • 6-7 carrots, quartered
  • ½ onion, diced
  • 2 chicken breasts
  • Olive oil
  • Maple syrup
  • Italian seasoning
  • Salt
  • Pepper

Do it:

Not so perfect lighting, but DELISH!  Not so perfect lighting, but DELISH!

  • Pre-heat 400 degrees
  • Cut up those veggies + onions.
  • Place them in a baking dish + drizzle some olive oil and maple syrup to cover them.
  • Add seasonings and stir it all up.
  • Plop those chicken breasts on top + place in the oven.
  • I check on them every 20 minutes, turn and stir – the chicken was ready in about an hour.

 

 

I would love to hear from you.

Leave a comment on the blog and let us know if you are a perfectionist, (or recovering) and what you are doing to shine your light.

 

Love + Perfectly Imperfect,

Keli

CONTINUE READING

5 Ways to Shift Your Low-Vibes to High-Vibe Energy

 

Do you ever get grumpy?

That’s a hell yes I’m sure. Unless you are Mother Teresa and I’m sure she even had some WTF moments.

Recently I had to check myself around the energy I was bringing to the table.

You know those days when you wake up late, or get off to a crappy start + it feels like you are being pelted with snowballs by a bunch of five-year olds? Nonstop.

For me, those alarm clock ignoring mornings look a little like bolting out of bed (sans meditation + journaling: my personal happy buttons), jumpstarting my toddler and father out of bed like a battery, grabbing a quick breakfast (my hippie, holistic heart is pissed now) and then bustling out the door leaving behind half the stuff my daughter needs for school, as well as a light or two left on (now the tree-hugger in me wants to cry).

Throughout this scene I am scattered all over the place, barking some crazy-ass orders while my daughter looks at me blankly, probably wondering, ‘who the hell has taken my mother hostage.’

I am SO not in the moment.

If Eckhart Tolle could only see me in those flashes: I think he would be praying feverishly for me, or documenting me via video on how NOT to be in the moment.

Needless to say, I’m consciously or unconsciously choosing to be out of the moment and trying to “catch up” to where I think I should be. And in choosing that hurried, I-can’t-catch-a-break type of energy is pricey. It will break the Bank of Energy and leave you penniless.

Because when I’m irritated for not waking up on time and carry that with me throughout the day on the Crazy Train, I bring that irritated energy everywhere I go.

I bring that piss-poor energy into the space field of my daughter, my father and when my husband is around, boy, he really gets pelted with those bullets. I spread it to the barista at the coffee shop, my daughters teacher and classroom, the waiter/waitress who is serving ME. All over the place I am spreading the NOT-SO love.

I don’t have to be spewing negative words, or badmouthing something to bring a low-vibe energy to the table. I do that just by holding those feelings in my body.

Now, all of this stuff I am talking about I am super aware of, but I am human and still have my instants when I don’t choose awareness of the present moment and instead go all zombie-like in my day-to-day life. I am choosing that unconscious part of me which wants to stay asleep sometimes because, well, we think it’s a bit easier that way.

Ahem! That’s when I have to call bullshit on myself. And then, I go into a place of remembering and recall cool stuff like this:

Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor

 

Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor (a neuroanatomist) expressed these words to Oprah on Super Soul Sunday about her experience when she was in the hospital and could not speak (due to a rare form of stroke). However, she could FEEL the energy of every doctor, nurse, visitor, etc. whom entered her room. 

She went on to say she knew when someone was rushing through their job, was in another “place” while tending to her and also the feeling of love and caring. She put these words outside her hospital door to let people know to be aware of the energy they bring to not only her room, but life in general.

I love these words and they remind me that anytime I allow/choose a low vibration – it is still my responsibility to hike that baby into high gear and infuse kick-ass, love-filled energy to myself and all the space I hold around me.

When I remember this responsibility and this space of energy I can immediately shift my existence in that very moment.

It’s NOT about ignoring or trying to push aside those moments in our life when we do feel slighted, angry, upset or rushed. Like I say, feel them, just don’t build a house there. Be human and feel your shiz. And then choose something different.

Here are a couple tips to help hike your ass into high-vibe gear when you get a little off: 

1.)  Breathe:

I think the quote goes: “Inhale the good shit. Exhale the bullshit.”

I know it sounds silly and small, but it can be a huge shifter! I recently started breathing my way through uncomfortable moments, or times when I feel super sensitive. If I’m not at home, I will go to the restroom, grab a stall and literally take 3-5 big, deep breaths. When I do that, I feel myself in my body and not so much in the mind, which can try to rule us. As Faith Hill wails, “Juuuuuuuuuuuuust Breathe.” 

2.)  Meditate:

I really try my best to get in some time in Thought-Less Land everyday. I can get cranky pants if I don’t start my day off with at least 5-10 minutes of meditation. They say prayer is when you talk to God + meditation is when God talks to you. I feel totally connected to The Divine when I’m meditating. Not to mention, I’m way more calm and able to check myself throughout the day better when I start it off with a little meditation.

Deepak Chopra’s “Living in Love” App.

If you’ve never meditated before + do not know where to begin Gabby Bernstein has a super fab blog: Beginners Guide to Meditation. Check it out!

And if you have been on the Meditation Train for a while my favorite go-to is Deepak Chopra’s “Living in Love” app –>

Deepak starts you off with a little guidance, you can set a timer within the app for how long you want to meditate and the background music is pretty darn relaxing.

 

3.)  Move your body:

I forget this one A LOT! Especially while I plop my booty down in a chair writing and staring at a computer: serious energy killer right there. I truly have to remember to GET UP + move. Whenever I get stuck creatively, or even feel, blah, I try and dance it out! Turn on a rockin’ tune and move that bod. Try to jump up and down + shake what your mama gave you! If you like yoga, get on the mat. Moving the body moves energy, so move it!

 

4.)  Journal:

One of my absolute favorite ways to shift some shiz quickly! Grab a notebook (it does NOT have to be fancy) and let it all out on the pages. Don’t sensor yourself. Write whatever you are thinking and feeling and leave it all on the pages. When I journal it out, I find myself feeling pretty free because all that “stuff” is out of my field + released into the ethers for The Divine to handle it. I love to journal in the morning, but if I don’t do that, I journal before bed, so I can release whatever I picked up throughout the day.

If you are not familiar with Julia Cameron and Morning Pages – get to know it! Her work with Morning pages is truly life changing for the artist in all of us.

As Julia explains it, Morning Pages are three pages of longhand, stream of consciousness writing, done first thing in the morning. *There is no wrong way to do Morning Pages*– they are not high art. They are not even “writing.” They are about anything and everything that crosses your mind– and they are for your eyes only. Morning Pages provoke, clarify, comfort, cajole, prioritize and synchronize the day at hand.”  Love that!

 

5.)  Read: 

Leaders are readers, yo! I carry a book with me at all times, especially when I’m in the car with the hubs, or waiting for an appointment, etc. One of my favorite ways to get my day going on the right foot is to read. I usually go for the self-help books, but whatever you prefer – go for it! Try reading, especially if you are going through something and need that extra positive helping hand in your life. Whenever I can be transported beyond myself with a book, I am way lighter on my feet throughout the day because those words stay with me. Reading keeps those brain cells on their toes and expands your mind. Read it out. Recently I went Goodwill Hunting and found a butt-load of books for super cheap! And when I’m done with the book, I will just recycle and donate them again. That is what my hubs would call a two-fer: got my beloved reading on + saved some money, honey + will be a part of the book recycling circle of Goodwill. Bam!

Goodwill-Hunting

 

Alright, alright, alright! If you try any of these suggestions, let me know how your energy shifts. Remember, we really are all in this together. You are not alone. So, reach out + share your story + keep shining! <3

 

Love + Holy Shifts,

Keli 

CONTINUE READING

How I Learned I Was An Empath

 

I’m not sure if essential oils have been introduced to you yet, but I’m about to introduce them to you as my latest experiment, as well as some stirring soul lessons I learned about myself in this process. Odd, I know, but bare with me. 🙂

Like I said in the last email, I have been experimenting with essential oils recently + it has been super fun!

Essential oils have been circulating in my world for a couple years now, especially when Pinterest became hugely popular and I saw all of the cool things you could make with them (hello – you can replace all of your household cleaners with these babies and so. much. mooooore!).

When we were out in Santa Barbara I was introduced to an essential oil company called dōTERRA, and was able to smell these divine lovelies, as well as see how they can be used in everyday life.

I was hooked, but it wasn’t until we moved back to Colorado that I chose to start playing with them on a larger scale.

My shipment of the oils came in this month + well, it has been a big o’ lab of experimentation. So much fun. Seriously!

Alright, let’s talk happy first (you know, before my interwoven, unexpected, soul breakdown) + the lowdown on essential oils.

Here is some info + tidbits to file away for yourself:

  • Essential Oils are aromatic compounds that are usually found in the bark, stems, seeds, flowers, roots, resins and other parts of a plant.
  • They have been around since ancient times – hello, Jesus, frankincense – but, have really become more mainstream recently with the holistic boom, science + research to back them up.
  • Essential Oils are obviously smelly-good, but also have medicinal and therapeutic benefits! Cool, huh?
  • They can be used for a large array of challenges – from emotional to physical application.
  • Essential Oils can be used aromatically, topically and internally (only SOME essential oils can be used internally, but more on that later).
  • These babies are powerfully concentrated, yo!
  • dōTERRA means “gift of the earth.”
  • dōTERRA was founded in 2008 + has grown fast with the holistic + alternative wave that is hitting now.

Also, fun little diddy: “essential” oils gain their name from the word “essence” due to the fragrances being the essence of these plants. (I had to add that in there because my bro asked me, what makes them “essential?” – well that’s why – the essence!).


Now…

Let’s talk the dark, the shadow, the soul stirring- where things got mirky for me…

And how the light did shine again after much crawling through the rain. 

As a tiny researcher and mostly an experimenter extraordinaire there are many reasons why I chose dōTERRA as my preference in essential oils, and even knowing my preference I would find myself online night after night getting caught up on all of these blogs and comments about why certain companies were better than others.

It was downright ugly in a lot of the places I went online. Mud slinging. Name calling. Low, low, vibe, yo.

I started to question myself, my decision I made with essential oils and soon I slipped into a super heavy-hearted energy space. I felt as though I was soaking up that dispirited energy on these blogs and online spaces. I was irritated, disgruntled, moody and felt super wonky!

I tried to talk myself out of those feelings: 

“I don’t care what people think.”  – ummm, apparently I give a shit ton of fucks what people think.

“Why am I taking this so damn serious, life is way too short to get caught up in this crap, Kel!” – that only worked for a couple seconds. I felt like a wounded warrior.

Talking myself out of it wasn’t really working. 

So, I went deep into prayer + meditation, loaded with my frankincense oil (great for meditation, spiritual awareness, etc.) – and soon after the word “Empath” kept showing up in my world.

YouTube videos + articles appeared out of nowhere for me to read about what an Empath is. And then all of a sudden I started to realize what was really going on!

Sometimes the Universe uses certain situations to help you grow yourself and you can either choose to grow and expand, or shrink and stay stuck.

I wanted to expand, so I kept following that energy by learning about Empaths (please read more about that HERE – great info + I bet some of you reading this are indeed an Empath!).

What I learned about myself as an Empath was kind of like the missing puzzle piece to my life. Truly. I know that sounds dramatic. Ha!

Here is a little snapshot of what an Empath is and may experience – are you one?

“Empaths are highly sensitive, finely tuned instruments when it comes to emotions. They feel everything, sometimes to an extreme, and are less apt to intellectualize feelings. Their sensitivity is the filter through which they experience life. Empaths are naturally giving, spiritually attuned and good listeners…
As a psychiatrist, many empaths come to me overwhelmed by the world. Their trademark is that they know where you’re coming from. Some can do this without taking on people’s feelings. However, for better or worse, others, like myself and many of my patients, can become angst-sucking sponges…If empaths are around peace and love, their bodies assimilate these and flourish. Negativity, though, often feels assaultive and exhausting. Thus, they’re particularly easy marks for emotional vampires, whose fear or rage can ravage empaths…”  – Judith Orloff, MD

There is SO much more to read up on and learn about on this topic, but what I’ve absorbed thus far has cracked my world wide open because now I can understand myself and my feelings so much better. And as Maya Angelou preaches, “When you know better, you do better!” Yes.

 

So, with ALL of that being said – I chose a way to handle talking about essential oils that feels damn good to me + I hope for you as well! I also learned to protect myself from others low vibe energy + am continuing to discern what are my feelings and when I’ve taken on others feelings, etc. A work in progress no doubt.

So, here goes some learning lessons for essential oils + beyond: 

  1. Just like nutrition and food, every BODY is different. No ONE diet works for everyone. And so it is with EVERYTHING in life. Even choosing essential oils. Do your due diligence and choose what works for YOU.
  2. Every essential oil company has some slight and large differences in how they produce their oils. One of the main reasons why I prefer dōTERRA is because they extract their oils from the plants where they are indigenous – lemon – Italy, lavender – France, frankincense – Oman, etc. And build close relationships with the farmers in these areas. Other companies may have seeds grown and work with the seed from start to “finish”, but these crops may be anywhere they choose.
  3. My largest takeaway + my whole intention behind this blog: EXPERIMENT! You just don’t know unless you try and then just keep tweaking. All life is an experiment and continuing to choose what works best for yourself. Sometimes the choosing for ourself is the hardest. Do it anyway, it gets easier.
  4. If you are feeling resistance – don’t push back. Lean into it. Allow it in. Keep an open heart. It will move through you much faster if you don’t try to swim upstream.
  5. You may not know why you are feeling what you are feeling in life – that’s cool. It will work itself out if you remain open + allow time to do its job and clarity to rise to the surface.
  6. Sometimes when you make a choice (like choosing a new path in life, career, school, relationship, etc.) for you your shit will surface in ways you wouldn’t believe (like taking in all the negativity people can spew on the internet) – don’t let it hold you back, work through it. Be open to the process.

Why did I write this crazy-ass blog on two different topics? 

Because I believe in transparency. What if you are going through something similar? We are not alone on this journey – dontcha’ know!

Because I know someone out there might relate to being an empath + it could be the light in their world that is desperately needed.

Because life presents you certain lessons in unexpected and interesting packages – sometimes through researching essential oils online + sifting through the contrast!

Because this is just the intro, yo – coming up is all the fun stuff I’ve been doing with these essential oils (remember, when I was talking about the light. Oh, the light!). I have been cooking with these babies, making household cleaners, concocting sprays for everything from “owies” to deodorant, as well as experimenting with frankincense, memory + my dad! How about that for fun?!! 🙂 Coming up on the blog next!

Here are some more resources on being an Empath: 

Some cool websites to learn more about dōTERRA:

 

 

Love + Soul Stirring Lessons, 

Keli

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How To Redefine Success On Your Terms

 

I recently finished a pretty darn life-changing book by Eckhart Tolle called “A New Earth – Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose” and daaaay-um – what I soaked up in this read is something I am totally experimenting with in my life now. So, I have to share with you what hit me super profoundly as I turned the last page of this book…

In case you are not familiar with Mr. Tolle (I like to think of him as my new spiritual boyfriend – I’m totally in love with this dude – and yes, my hubs knows! Click HERE to check out his webby-site + get to know this lover. 😉 ) his work is about choosing and living in the present moment and he even wrote another book called “The Power of Now.”

Near the end of “A New Earth” Mr. Tolle writes about success + says, “Don’t let a mad world tell you that success is anything other than a successful moment.” When I read that it pierced me like only truth can. Eckhart talks immensely about how living in the present moment is the true power of authentic living, no matter what you are doing. 

I thought about “success” and what I deemed successful and how I viewed my life and choices based upon the worlds idea, as well as my own thoughts on “success.”

I simmered on the idea of success and how it has been woven into my life and all of the ways I tried so desperately to live unto that idea of success – whether it be as a writer, a health coach, a wife, a daughter, a sister, or even as a mother – and…

I found that determining whether or not I was successful was also a mean-ass bridge to judgment + a major sucker of the present moment. And well, we can’t have judgement and love at the same time, so that sure as hell isn’t going to work anymore. 

Are you ready + willing to re-define what “success” means to you + begin living a life that reflects that?

What if a successful present moment is being in the stillness of YOU, void of judgment and fear?…Showing up completely as you and basking in the glory of THAT.

I started experimenting with dropping what I viewed as “success” + picked up a load of Present Moment, Love + Dancing with The Divine. 

What the hell does that look like, you might be thinking?

Well, it looks + feels a lot like…

  • less striving, more BEING.
  • more living in the moment, less building castles in the sky.
  • more of the authentic me, less of the screaming ego me.
  • more leaning into the IS-NESS of life…the flow, much less time spent with my thinking cap on.  
  • more enjoying the journey, less Destination Disease. 

And when I actually CHOOSE this, moment-by-moment I am a fuller version of Keli…and so are you. But, only if we choose it…each moment we have.

Sure there are times when I’m not in the flow + not choosing, but the beauty is I can always come back to this moment. It’s never too far away + it’s super simple to return to…just by choice.

 

Love + Spiritual Boyfriends + Choice,

Keli

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Throwing a Prayer Party + How To Ask For Help

 

I recently turned the Prayer Party up a huge freakin’ notch in my life.  I’m talkin’ not just at night when I’m half asleep and know praying will actually help me fall asleep. Ha!

Nah, this Prayer Party is all day, everyday. Check it:


:: In the morning when I want to roll over and pick-up my phone and stroll through social mediaI pray to be used by The Divine. I pray for all Beings everywhere to be happy + free. And mostly, I’m thankful.

Thankful for another sunrise, breath, health and a chance to be in awe of this experience.

:: In the shower when I am apt to unleash my thoughtsI’m praying for peace and moments of silence.

:: During the day when something doesn’t go “my way” or I find myself irritated I pray for surrender.

:: When worry enters – I pray this prayer by Tosha Silver (CLICK HERE to check her work out – finding her + reading her book “Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine Take The Lead” changed my life, seriously):

“Change me Beloved into One filled with faith. Let me trust that You know exactly how to guide me. Let me relax and know that the right actions will be shown and I can follow them with a courageous, grateful heart. The perfect solutions are already selected and my own body and instincts will show the way.”

:: And when I have a desire (or preference as Tosha Silver would point out) in my heart I pray for guidance and direction and then…more surrender. 


I mean, have you ever consistently asked for what you desired and then just let it go?

Whatever your belief is in + what you choose to call It – God/Universe/Source/Divine/Spirit, etc. – prayer and falling into the arms of the unknown are some of the sweet spots in relationship with what I call The Divine.

 

Recently, as the hubs and I have been rebuilding, especially financially, from our big-ass adventure in Santa Barbara, CA, I have been desiring and preferring really, for our family to have a second car (first-world problems, right? Hahaha.).

So, as I dove deeper into my own spirituality and communion with The Divine, I chose to ask for what the hell I wanted + throw one hell of a Prayer Party!

And I did just that.

I prayed for the perfect resources and timing to collide for us to acquire a second vehicle. Every time I worried about “how” that would happen, or hell IF that was going to happen…I prayed again. And again. And again. Until, literally, it became super easy to do!

BUT, here is the sweet spot, guys….ready…

I also LET GO after I prayed.

I didn’t hang onto my desire, or try to force and will it into manifestation. I simply prayed for what was on my heart, asked The Divine for guidance and released any expectation I had surrounding my prayer.

Now THAT my friends, is a Prayer Party!

  • Answer the invitation to join the party – aka: SHOW UP!
  • Dance with your desires.
  • Rock out with The Divine + fly your Freak Flag.
  • And then leave that party so joyful from expression – you don’t care what really happens because you KNOW…all is well. It truly, truly is. No matter what.

Once I stopped trying to ram the square peg into the round hole of life and began to bathe in my faith and soak in the present moment without future trippin’….life flows in those moments, as long as I keep choosing it.

And guess what? The Divine was orchestrating the perfect get-up for us apparently…in the perfect time. Say hello to our pretty little, gas happy, Honda Accord. She might be old, but she still purrs. Go, baby, go!

Remember, even if the car, or whatever you are praying for, doesn’t come or you feel like your prayers are not being answered. Have faith that indeed, your prayers are ALWAYS  being answered. Keep throwing wild-ass Prayer Parties, relax into the present moment + enjoy the journey…

The Divine has a larger dream for your life – beyond your imagination! 

 

Who wants to join the party? Leave a comment below and let us know how you are getting your Prayer Party started + what shifts you are experiencing within yourself?

 

Prayer Party + Freak Flags,

Keli

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